YEAAY! I am getting a brand new pair
of leather shoes worth 8000 bucks on my birthday… really? Lucky you, I wish I
could get some quality stuff like you too.” Seems like a pretty normal
conversation between any 2 of your effusive classmates doesn’t it? But sitting
here now as I come to think of it, what amazes me the most is that neither of
them had seen the shoes yet and it was just the cost that decided the class.
Such prejudice without even looking!! So much for delusion. Cost and appearances certainly rule the
market and why not, no one wants to be left behind on the fashion front now,
does he? Low waist jeans among boys were a thing when I joined college. Can’t
help smiling as I think what’s going to happen to the jeans by the time I pass
out. Well, this is it…this is the modern society that we all are a part of. If
you want to achieve something you’ll have to think out of the box, be different
which usually requires looking different yourself and that’s precisely the
marathon that everyone’s running. This text is what a guy like you
writes as he takes some time off, to look back and see whether we’ve
really been running in the right direction.
writes as he takes some time off, to look back and see whether we’ve
really been running in the right direction.
We’ve managed to get almost
everything that we wanted either by working for it or
influencing and projecting ourselves to be the rightful owners, and all this is possible by staying within the boundaries of our social etiquettes. We have evolved from our primitive forebears into beings who’ve now subjugated all other creatures, invented and built wonders until now and continue to do so without fail, pushing adamantly against the ceiling of our limitations. But in building up this
superstructure we’ve brought into being a society with intricate and complex relationships which have become the new challenge. No matter what
you desire from life, the other guy’s ambitions and expectations always constitute an obstruction or more likely a vital input. The present world is designed such that it’s going to be a hell lot of difficult to move up the ladder without the
cooperation of our fellow humans. This has rather disheartened the section of people who used to stand up against the flow, against this situational paradigm. It’s difficult to speak up against such an overwhelming majority especially when their opinion happens to determine where you end up. So we’ve settled into a peaceful relationship of indifference with it or simply turned into dexterous people pleasers desiring approbation. So much for the human psyche!!
influencing and projecting ourselves to be the rightful owners, and all this is possible by staying within the boundaries of our social etiquettes. We have evolved from our primitive forebears into beings who’ve now subjugated all other creatures, invented and built wonders until now and continue to do so without fail, pushing adamantly against the ceiling of our limitations. But in building up this
superstructure we’ve brought into being a society with intricate and complex relationships which have become the new challenge. No matter what
you desire from life, the other guy’s ambitions and expectations always constitute an obstruction or more likely a vital input. The present world is designed such that it’s going to be a hell lot of difficult to move up the ladder without the
cooperation of our fellow humans. This has rather disheartened the section of people who used to stand up against the flow, against this situational paradigm. It’s difficult to speak up against such an overwhelming majority especially when their opinion happens to determine where you end up. So we’ve settled into a peaceful relationship of indifference with it or simply turned into dexterous people pleasers desiring approbation. So much for the human psyche!!
Personally, I’ve always been
attracted to psychology as a subject, ever since I earned how to pronounce it, not only because
it sounds cool but because it works on one concrete logic that the traits of
any person are indelibly stamped in the shape of his body—an X ray by which you
can read the characteristics of any person on sight. I do this very often when
I am sitting alone in a crowded place, whether it’s my classroom, or the
college playground, any marketplace or the airport; observing people as they
indulge in their regular monotonous activities without realizing that their bodies
are actually giving out clues which can be deciphered to precisely predict
what’s going on in their head at the moment. They
are their true selves at that moment, easier to read and hence vulnerable in a way as they might say. And once you master the basics, it’s going to become evident to you too that the present generation has really succumbed to social insecurities regarding their personalities and have failed to wield them. Guys of younger age
groups striving for better personalities find it difficult to inculcate new habits, so they turn to easier present sources instead, that help them project themselves as someone entirely different from what they actually are. That’s a very basic tendency of human psychology. Social networking sites help them elude the reality, by filling in that void in their personality which was probably making them insecure regarding their potential to attract the opposite sex or dazzle the world enough. Now I don’t bear any grudge against a virtual network that is helping you connect to people who are physically out of reach and share your photos, views and thoughts with them. But it’s really hard for me to swallow the fact that the ethereal profile that I am seeing, actually belongs to the guy who sits next to me in the chemistry class. So if you’ve been in touch with a love guru online for months and consider him to be a sanctum full of invaluable wisdom, think again. He might actually be some 11th standard kid with a very bright future ahead of him.
are their true selves at that moment, easier to read and hence vulnerable in a way as they might say. And once you master the basics, it’s going to become evident to you too that the present generation has really succumbed to social insecurities regarding their personalities and have failed to wield them. Guys of younger age
groups striving for better personalities find it difficult to inculcate new habits, so they turn to easier present sources instead, that help them project themselves as someone entirely different from what they actually are. That’s a very basic tendency of human psychology. Social networking sites help them elude the reality, by filling in that void in their personality which was probably making them insecure regarding their potential to attract the opposite sex or dazzle the world enough. Now I don’t bear any grudge against a virtual network that is helping you connect to people who are physically out of reach and share your photos, views and thoughts with them. But it’s really hard for me to swallow the fact that the ethereal profile that I am seeing, actually belongs to the guy who sits next to me in the chemistry class. So if you’ve been in touch with a love guru online for months and consider him to be a sanctum full of invaluable wisdom, think again. He might actually be some 11th standard kid with a very bright future ahead of him.
I accept that not everyone has the same reason to sign up for such sites, obviously not everyone on such networking sites have social insecurities, and that’s precisely the reason why all profiles are not as deceiving. But these poser clowns can be a bad influence, the multiplier effect as the wise ones say. When you see something wrong enough times it certainly seems much more acceptable. Compliance to the norm has been the rule ever since we learnt to live together. That probably marked the beginning of the decline of individualism.
Have you ever wondered why
most profile photos flash sunglasses, cars, bikes or a trendy hairdo? There’s
more to it than the simple desire to look good. An illustration is probably in
order here. For now, let’s go back in the time of our dear old friend ‘Fred-The
Flintstones’, i.e. the stone age and see if we find something similar in that
era. Men used to go hunting, mark their areas and fight to retain them, and
protect the females and the family in general. On the other hand women used to
collect fruits, take care of their babies and protect them and also cook the
food brought by men. The entire foundations of the civilization thrived upon
the relentless efforts of both the genders, and would have collapsed if either
one of them was missing or if they decided to switch their jobs. I mean men
were just too wild to handle the babies and sending a woman to run around
fidgeting weapons and hunting dangerous predators doesn’t look like a very good plan. So the responsibility of hard-core physical labour was put on men, while a cavewoman preferred falling in love with a muscular, strong jawed caveman with a lot of facial hair and harsh voice. A muscular guy meant that he was strong enough to protect her and from biological point of view good genes for her babies. Facial hair and harsh voice further consolidated his physical strength and
highlighted his virility.
fidgeting weapons and hunting dangerous predators doesn’t look like a very good plan. So the responsibility of hard-core physical labour was put on men, while a cavewoman preferred falling in love with a muscular, strong jawed caveman with a lot of facial hair and harsh voice. A muscular guy meant that he was strong enough to protect her and from biological point of view good genes for her babies. Facial hair and harsh voice further consolidated his physical strength and
highlighted his virility.
You might have heard of Red Indians,
with their weird markings on the cheeks and around their eyes. Those were not
just the regular old HOO-LA-LA thingies. Or let’s take Ninja Turtles for
instance. Now there are certain things about this cartoon that I couldn’t
fathom, like -why the hell were they called turtles in the first place when they
were more of fighting tortoises running around in green shells on 2 feet.
Anyway the reason why I mentioned them here is that each of
the 4 turtles wore a strip of colored cloth around their head. Markings or coverings like these not only make an invader look fierce, but also helps him subjugate his opponent easily by thwarting his attempts to fight back psychologically. Eyes and facial expressions play a pivotal role in gestural communication, hiding them can make him look tougher than he actually is, enhancing the suppressor’s dominance thus giving him an edge over his opponent. It might now not be difficult to envisage why certain complex ridden chaps prefer
wearing their Ray ban sunglasses at night, or spend hours together on Photoshop to look muscular and catchy in their photos.
the 4 turtles wore a strip of colored cloth around their head. Markings or coverings like these not only make an invader look fierce, but also helps him subjugate his opponent easily by thwarting his attempts to fight back psychologically. Eyes and facial expressions play a pivotal role in gestural communication, hiding them can make him look tougher than he actually is, enhancing the suppressor’s dominance thus giving him an edge over his opponent. It might now not be difficult to envisage why certain complex ridden chaps prefer
wearing their Ray ban sunglasses at night, or spend hours together on Photoshop to look muscular and catchy in their photos.
Tacit compliance therefore is a genetic thing, the entire fabric of our brain’s wiring has incorporated these basic instincts of our ancestors, it’s something that we all have inherited and do subconsciously. But that’s no excuse of using sources like a social networking site to hide flaws or weaknesses. How can you expect to improve if you can’t even accept yourself in the first place. Stop dreaming and start living, become the person you wanted to be, rather than wondering whether you look better in a black and white or a colored photo. Be the better change, authentic change that the world needs to see. You don’t have to change yourself to deceive someone and be able to stand out in the crowd. You don’t always have to look like a gem to prove you are one. So why not try being the real you and for once in your life have some ownership of and credibility behind your actions and words and see how that goes? Between following a trend and setting one I’d much rather do the latter. Besides you’ll come to realize that no matter who you are there are enough people who like you anyway and life is all about driving your own car while getting along with other drivers on the highway, isn’t it?
~ Anand Bains,
mechanical,
2nd year.
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